


A Hundred Thrown-Out Speeches

by triggerlil



Series: Tumblr Prompts [1]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Letters, M/M, Memories, POV Draco Malfoy, Post-Break Up, Song: The Archer (Taylor Swift), Tumblr Prompt, song prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-27
Updated: 2020-02-27
Packaged: 2021-02-28 02:41:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 452
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22916419
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/triggerlil/pseuds/triggerlil
Summary: "I wake in the night, I pace like a ghostThe room is on fire, invisible smokeAnd all of my heroes die all aloneHelp me hold onto you"
Relationships: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter
Series: Tumblr Prompts [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1660129
Comments: 9
Kudos: 24





	A Hundred Thrown-Out Speeches

Draco’s eyelids fluttered open, the crackling fire in the hearth bringing him into waking. He was staring down at a notebook, still dressed in his work slacks, white shirt sleeves rolled up to his elbows. He pressed a cool palm to his eyes, forcing images of ricocheting spells into the background. He tried to remember what he had been doing, but memories faded easily these days and he couldn’t quite keep his thoughts in place, every word a bit of ash blown in the wind.

He gripped the notebook now, looking at the little he had written before falling asleep—but it was painful to look at, and so he glanced around the room. Nothing much had changed since he had sat down in front of the fireplace, two coffee cups left next to the couch (he had been meaning to pick those up for a while now), a briefcase and its contents strewn across the ground (he couldn’t bring himself to put it away), and crumpled papers littered around his feet.

He had naively hoped that a key in the front door had woken him up, but the familiar sound of someone clumsily removing their shoes hadn’t followed. No floorboards had creaked with familiarity and no one had come into the living room, glasses askew, to kiss him on the back of the head, admonishing him for falling asleep in front of the fireplace while writing again.

He picked up his pen from the floor.

_I’ve written this letter repeatedly, and I still don’t know how to say what I want to. I envy how easy it was for you to leave, once you made up your mind. I’ve never been good at doing that, as everyone likes to remind me. I really thought you would stay this time though—I have no idea what I was thinking. That a good hero would have stayed? That a better hero would have tried to make it work? I know what you said when you left; that we’ve tried a million times. That it never works. You were crying then, but does it really make a difference? After all, you still left._

Draco ripped out the page, crumpled it, and threw it into the fire. He got up angrily, pushing the chair backwards with a screech, and one by one grabbed all the crumpled notes, throwing them into the fire to watch them shrivel and disintegrate. He didn’t need these useless words, it wasn’t as if he’d ever say them, he never did. Even in school, when he had stayed up late into the night pacing the Slytherin common room, writing speeches in his head he knew he could never say out loud. 

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally [a prompt on tumblr](https://triggerlil.tumblr.com/post/190673884775), if you liked it please consider leaving a comment/kudos or like/reblog the post!! Thank you :)


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